Never Be Alone
by martinezashtin
Summary: This is a story about my OC Billy Mitchell and her relationship with her best friend Sodapop Curtis. A lot will happen to test their friendship but they've made one promise to each other, to never let the other be alone. This series goes into the life of Billy, and you have the opportunity to watch her friendship with soda grow while also catching glimpses of the past.
1. Chapter 1

I can still remember the day I met Sodapop Curtis like it was yesterday. We were both 5 years old and I had just been placed at a new school. My mom passed away in an accident a few months prior and I had been placed in the care of my aunt and uncle. I didn't really have any friends, and since I was fairly new I was always seen as a target. It was a spring day during morning recess, just cold enough to have to wear a jacket but mine was way too big for me, it was a hammy down from my cousin Jake. I was sitting by myself on the other side of the schoolyard by the old monkey bars. No one ever played on them anymore, they were old and rusted, I liked to sit there to think and get a moment away from the others. I was sitting in front of the metal ladder leading up to the bars when someone yanked my sleeves back behind me, pulling me tight against the ladder. I felt so panicked, I tried to pull myself free but someone had tied my oversized sleeves together in a knot behind me.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" I heard someone say from behind, running their fingers through my hair. A group of soc boys emerged from behind the bars, a boy at the front taller than the rest spoke. "Poor, dirty little greaser girl, sitting here all alone. Where are all your friends?" He laughed, tipping my chin up to look at him.

I shrugged him away. "Bug off and untie me soc, before I give ya somethin to knock that smile off your face." I snapped, pulling and pulling at my jacket, trying to break the knot.

"He stepped on my ankle and grabbed my cheeks making me look at him. "You better watch yourself Ms. Greasy, are you just sad because you have no friends?" He chuckled, stepping on my ankle with more force as I winced.

"Well I-I-"

"-I'm her friend!"

I heard a voice from behind me yell, which made me even more confused, because I really didn't have any friends. I felt someone trying to untie my jacket.

"So watch it Derek, or next time I see you messin with her I won't be as nice to ya."

"Oh hop off Grease, we were only messing around.. she isn't worth it anyway." Derek smirked "Let's go guys... I've got better things to do than get covered in grease."

Just like that they were gone, I still didn't have a clue who stood up for me, he was still behind me trying to untie the knot in my jacket.

"Wow, they done this up real good on ya didn't they?" I heard the boy say from behind me.

"Yeah... they're lucky I wasn't able to break it, I woulda knocked em." I growled, I heard him giggle as the knot finally came undone. I turned myself around to see a boy staring back at me laughing. He had golden blonde hair slicked back and twinkling blue eyes. His smile grew wide as he laughed.

"You're funny, I like that." He extended his hand towards me, "My names Sodapop, but my brothers call me Soda."

"I giggled, shaking his hand, "My names Billy."

"Friends?" Soda smiled at me.

"Friends." I returned his smile, thinking that this was the best day of my life.

**End Flash Back**

Staring at the clouds I was completely lost in thought, I smiled as I remembered that day. Sitting at the same playground, but now 16, it feels like so long ago.

"Billyyyyyy..."

A hand waves in front of my face.

"Bills, are you even paying attention to me?"

I snap out of it, Soda is waving his hands in front of my face attempting to get my attention.

"Sorry," I laugh "I-I was paying attention the whole time!"

"Liar!" He chuckled pointing his finger directly at me. "What'd I say then, huh?" Soda grinned crouching down in front of me, staring at me with those big blue eyes, waiting for an answer he knew I didn't have.

"Oh you know... that girl, and her gorgeous eyes!" I teased, " And her hugeee boo-"

"Oh hop off Bills!" Soda cut me off laughing, "That is definitely not what I said." He sat himself down next to me and layed his head on my shoulder.

"C'mon Billy, what cha thinkin 'bout?"

I smiled as I layed my head down on his, " I was just thinkin 'bout the day we met."

"Oh, I remember that day clear as crystal!" Soda exclaimed standing up, " I remember you were sittin here all tied up and what not, kinda like this," He spoke as he typed my sleeves behind the metal pole we were leaning against.

"Soda!" I giggled.

"And you were just yellin and hollerin for help, oh some handsome boy, please, please come and save me from the mean socs!" He laughed. "And then your wish came true, cause there I came walkin along, the most handsome boy you ever had seen." Soda wiggled his eyebrows and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Nah," I shrugged "I've seen way handsomer boys than you." I smirked.

"That's a mighty brave thing for a girl to say when she's still tied to a pole, don't ya think Bills?" Soda smiled, as he began approaching me.

My eyes grew wide as I realized his intentions, "Sodapop Curtis! Don't you dare!" I wiggled, trying to break the knot.

"I don't know what you're talkin 'bout..." He laughed before launching himself towards me, tickling my sides.

"Sodaahahaha! Eeeek!" I could barely get the words to come out, "Thatsahaha nottttt fairrrahaha! Youu knowhehe immm tickhahalishah!"

"Soda was laughing too, as he wriggled his fingers up and down my sides. "I have no idea what you're talking about Bills, how could I have known?" He gave me his best puppy dog eyes, still tickling my sides.

"Bastarddahha!" I yelled out, giggling. I am extremely ticklish, and Soda knew that, he's known since we were kids, and he always uses it to get his way.

"What was that Billy?" He laughed, "Say it, say I'm the handsomest man you've ever met."

"Neverheheh!" I wiggled, trying to break the knot in my jacket.

"That's not it, let's try this again." He reached his hands under my arms with a devilish grin plastered on his face, "Say it, or else."

"You wouldn't dare Soda!" I squealed, panicking, trying to break free.

"Oh you know I would!" He smirked, "Say it, or prepare to be tickled!" Soda wiggled his to fingers lightly against my underarms.

I squealed, "Soda, you can't always win!"

"You wanna bet?"

"Go to hell!" I laughed as he began tickling under my arms. That was my most ticklish spot and he knew it, he was so unfair! I was laughing so hard I could barely breathe.

"Say ittt!" Soda laughed

"Okayhehe okayyy!" I barely managed to yell out, Soda stopped tickling me.

"Go ahead, say it!" He said, poking my stomach.

"Fine!" I giggled, my face flushed, "You're the handsomest man I've ever met!"

Soda untied my jacket and laid next to me on the ground looking up at the evening sky with the biggest smile plastered on his face. It was quiet for a long while, all I could hear was our breathing before Soda broke the silence.

"God I just love that." He chuckled, looking over at me.

"Love what?" My face was bright red from laughing, I looked down at him.

"Getting to see you smile."

I blushed, laying down next to him, I wrapped my arms around his waist. "I love you Soda."

He pulled me closer and kissed me on the top of my head, "I love you too Billy."

We laid there at the play ground watching the sun go down, and I couldn't help but wonder what I did to deserve a best friend like him.


	2. Chapter 2: Life is Black N' Blue

**Thank you to everyone for reading my story! I would just like to express that I do not own the Outsiders story or any of the characters, they are all owned by S.E. Hinton, I only claim rights to my OC Billy. I hope you all enjoy, please review! Constructive criticism is appreciated but please don't be mean or rude, just a girl writing and doing what I love!**

I closed the register and finished up sweeping at the DX as my shift came to an end. I stepped outside and entered the garage to see Soda elbow deep in the hood of a pretty banged up car. I walked over to the car and knocked on the hood receiving a glare from soda.

"Don't get too lost in there," I laughed "It's almost time for you ta head home."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Soda replied, still focused on the car.

I stepped around him, "Isn't that what you said last time? Then you showed up home at midnight and Darry had a fit and almost killed ya." I said, ruffling his blonde hair.

"Billy." He warned, finally looking up at me smirking, his face and arms were covered in black grease. "Don't mess with my hair, ya hear?"

"Oh I hear, I'll just put it back then." I laughed, ruffling his hair even more, "Oops!" I shrugged my shoulders.

"Billy!" He growled playfully before wrapping me tight in his arms.

"Soda! Knock it off, yer gonna get me covered in grease!"

"Oh? Ya mean like this?" He chuckled, rubbing his dirty cheeks against mine as I giggled finally breaking free from his grasp.

I rubbed my cheeks as black grease smeared itself onto my hand. "Yer such a pain in the ass, ya know that?"

Soda smiled ear to ear, that smile made my heart melt every single time. "But I'm yer pain in the ass, and you love me." He said in a singsong voice.

"And yer damn lucky I do." I smiled back, "I'm gonna stop home and get changed before I come over for dinner ok?"

"Sounds like a plan." Soda replied.

"Don't be late this time." I yelled to him as I began to walk down the street, I saw him wave me off as I continued down the road towards home.

As I approached the side door to my aunt and uncles I could hear yelling coming from inside. My Auntie works late most nights, which is fine because I have Jake to keep me company. I know she means well, tryin to do better for us by workin more, but having to be home with my Uncle is just too unpredictable.

"Where's my beer kid?" I heard my uncle yell followed by something being thrown across to kitchen.

"Dad, I told ya ain't none of it left!" My cousin was trying to reason with him, he must be drunk again.

"Well then where the hell did it go?"

I walked through the side door and quickly made my way past the kitchen, trying as hard as I could to go unnoticed.

"Ey! Girl, Billlyy!" I heard my uncle shout as he stumbled towards my door, "Bitch I'm talkin ta you!"

I turned to face my uncle as he made his way down the hall, my cousin close behind him.

"Girl when I'm talkin, ya better listen." He snapped, "Where the hell did ya put my beer?"

I clenched my teeth, this always happens. He drinks all the beer, but where did it go? Jake's gone out, but Uncle Dave is still convinced that he's hidin and I won't tell him where. I go out to one man and come home to a monster. Unpredictable. Unreliable. Piss, poor, drunk.

"Ya drank it all Uncle Dave." I sighed, shaking my head, "It's gone because ya drank it all, there ain't none left." I stated calmly as his face grew bright red.

"Are you callin me a liar? You ungrateful bitch!" He reached out his hand.

"Dad, just stop it ok!" Jake shouted from behind him, "I'll go buy ya some more, just leave Billy alone."

My uncle spun around and shoved Jake into the wall, "Watch your mouth boy!"

I grabbed my uncle's shoulder and pulled hard, "Leave em alone, it's me you really got a problem with, take it up with me."

I winced as I felt someone grab the back of my hair, my uncle sneered into my ear "You better watch your goddamn mouth."

I looked to Jake as he lay on the floor and stared him down with a face that told him to get away. Jake was always trying him best to protect me, ever since we were small. But I never could stand seeing him get hurt because of me, I'd rather have it be me who's takin the beating than him. We all knew that this was because of me.

He reached his hand out to grab onto my uncle but I screamed at him, "Jake, you get away! Go to Dally's now!" My uncle turned to grab for him too, but I elbowed him in the ribs as Jake ran out the door.

"It's better this way." I whispered to myself, "It's better this way..." Tears streamed down my face.

Ever since the day I moved in, things started to change. My Uncle drank every night, he became a mean and violent man. I looked too much like my mom, Uncle Dave hated my dad, and now he was stuck with me. He never let me forget it.

"I'll go get ya more beer Uncle, I promise." I cried out as he grabbed my arm and twisted.

"Fuck you!" He yelled, shoving me into the wall. "You ungrateful bitch, after everything I've done for you, you come into my house and talk to me like that in front of my son?"

"I-I'm sorry!" I stammered trying to push him off, "Just leave me be! I can do better, I can try harder!" Hot tears stung my face.

"Naw girl, now you'll learn yer lesson, so stupid." He shook his head, "…just like yer mom." He drove a fist straight into my right eye, knocking me to the floor.

"Maybe next time-" kick "you'll be more-" kick "grateful." He seethed, looking down at me as I grabbed at my chest struggling to inhale.

"I'm gonnaa go get some more beeer." He slurred, "And I better not see you in my housee when I get backk." With that he closed the door.

I lay on the floor in a crying heap, unable to control my sobs. This always happens, what is so wrong with me? I winced as I cried, my ribs aching.

Tears streaming down my face, I picked myself up from the floor of our hallway making my way to the bathroom. I had dinner with the Curtis's in less than an hour, and I had to figure out somethin to say. I gazed at my reflection in the mirror, purple dancing its way around my right eye. Lifting my shirt, blue and black flowers began to blossom amongst my ribs. This time, I sighed, was going to be pretty hard to lie about.


	3. Chapter 3: Protect the Ones You Love

Walking towards the Curtis's I had no idea what I was going to say. I haven't been telling them the truth and they're like family to me, how was I supposed to now? The only other person who knew about what's been going on is Dally and it's only because Dally is Jake's best friend.

That's why I sent him there during the fight, whenever things get bad I need Jake to go to Dally's. That way I know he's safe, that way I know that he won't get hurt because of me. Jake and I have gotten into fights before because all he wants to do is protect me but I'm too scared to let him. The last time I let Jake stay my uncle knocked him on the floor, he was knocked out cold for 3 hours, I can't stand to let something like that happen again. Not because of me.

What hurts worse then the beatings themselves is knowing that I've lied to Soda this whole time. He's my best friend, we don't have any secrets, at least that's what he thinks… I've seen Sodapop through a lot. When his parents died we were all devastated, but Soda.. he wouldn't eat or drink nearly anything for weeks; he refused to come out of his room. I remember after about a week of him shutting everyone else out (he literally locked the door and refused to open it) I couldn't stand the thought of him making himself so alone, when I promised to never let him be that way. I actually got so mad that I kicked down his door, he looked so stunned looking up at me from the bed, he looked so tired.. fragile. I held him for 4 hours as he finally cried for the first time since we found out about the accident. After that he had me sleep with him for the next 2 weeks, and I didn't mind, because all I wanted to do was protect him in any way I could, from the hurt he was feeling. That's just one of the reasons why I know that all he would want to do is protect me, but I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something ever happened to him. Sometimes being a best friend is protecting them even when they don't know that you are.

As I approached their door I could hear Ponyboy and Darry joking around in the kitchen laughing at one another. Walking into the living room Pony heard my steps and turned around to greet me.

"Heya Billy, long time no se-"

He stopped mid-sentence looking directly at my face, I knew what was coming and I wasn't ready for it.

"Billy!" He exclaimed rushing towards me. "What on earth happened to you?"

"It's nothin." I tried to blow it off, walking away but he grabbed onto my shoulder, I winced.

"Darry!" Pony yelled, "It don't look like nothin Bills." He whispered to me harshly.

Darry walked into the room fixing his gaze right on my face before rushing over.

"Now Billy, don't you go lyin to me, who did this to ya?"

My lip quivered as I managed to stammer out "I-it was a soc boy, o-outside the movies." A tear streamed down my cheek, I quickly wiped it away. "I didn't see who cause it was startin to get dark.."

I will not cry, I thought to myself, I will not cry.

"Goddamn socs." Darry hissed under his breath, "Did they get cha anywhere else?" He looked concerned.

I hated lying to them. Saying I tripped or ran into something was one thing, the millions of tiny excuses I've managed to make up over the years, they were such small lies. But when the big stuff happened, I had to make up big lies, and every time I did I felt myself handing a piece over to a person I didn't know. The person I was slowly becoming with each and every lie I told to the ones who loved me the most.

"No, I'm ok." I lied again, "Just a little shaken is all." I walked over and sat on the couch. "I'm just glad I'm here now." I smiled dimly.

I heard the shower turn off as the bathroom door creaked open.

"Billy? Is that you?" Soda called to me from the bathroom.

"Yup, it's me Soda!" I called back, nervous.

"I'll be right out, I'm just gonna put some clothes on." He yelled, "Unless you prefer me naked!" I heard him chuckle, crossing the hall to his bedroom.

"Trust me, no one wants to see you naked!" I laughed, trying to keep my voice from cracking. "Can you just promise me one thing though?"

"Yeah, I guess." I heard him say as he rummaged through dresser drawers.

"Just don't freak out ok?"

Footsteps down the hallway, the floor creaked loudly with each step, I took a deep breath as I felt Pony grip my hand tightly.

"Why would I freak ou-". Soda stopped talking as he came around the corner in his jeans, drying his hair. He looked into my eyes and his face dropped as the towel he was holding dropped from his hands to the floor.

"Oh god Bills..." He croaked out, voice cracking, "What happened?"

I took a deep breath as my lip quivered, I will not cry, I promised myself, I will not cry.


	4. Chapter 4: It's Better This Way

**So this chapter is a bit longer to make up for the very short last one! I also decided to experiment with switching POV's between Billy and Soda for this chapter since there is so much going on. I really hope you guys enjoy this chapter and hopefully chapter 5 will be coming soon! Don't forget to follow the story to never miss an update and please please please review, I love all of your lovely comments and suggestions** **J** **Just remember not to be hurtful! Have a lovely day and enjoy the chapter!**

 **Soda's POV**

I looked into those big green eyes and I could see the tears starting to form. I knew it was taking everything for her not to cry, Billy's never liked cryin, especially in front of people. She's so afraid we'll think she's weak, when Billy's always been one of the toughest girls I know.

It was just last month that she got hurt like this, some guy at school shoved her up against the wall and banged her up pretty bad. But looking at her now sitting next to me, her eyes look so empty. I can feel the anger rising up. I'm supposed to be the one to protect her, the color around her eye made me tense up, heck, I sure am doin a stand up job.

"Bills, you can't seriously have not seen at least one of 'em?". I tried to sound calm but I knew it wasn't working. "At least tell me what they were wearing for Christ sake!"

She looked away from me her voice barely a whisper " It was so dark Soda... I didn't see who."

"I shoulda been there Bills, I shoulda had you wait and walked you home from the DX myself, then none of this woulda happ-"

"Sodapop!" She almost yelled, snapping me from my rambling. "It's not your fault, p-please don't think it's your fault.. I shoulda been more careful.. you couldn't of known, just please don't blame yourself." She pleaded holding back tears. "Please..." She managed to choke out as the tears began rolling down her cheeks.

I didn't want her to cry, I hated seeing her so upset, I pulled her to my chest and laid back, holding her against me I looked up at the ceiling as hot tears began to soak my shirt. "It's gonna be alright," I cooed, running my fingers along her back, as she let out a sob, "It's gonna be alright."

I felt a tear hit my cheek before realizing that it was my own. Pony looked to me, peeking around the corner of the kitchen wall, shaking his head. We both knew somethin was goin on with Billy, she hasn't been tellin us the truth, and I needed to find out why. Because when you love someone, sometimes you can't just let things go..

 **Billy's POV**

I opened my eyes to find myself curled up with Soda on the couch, we must have dozed off. My face buried into his now wet t-shirt, I can't believe I let myself cry like that. I looked up to see Soda asleep, with one arm snug around my waist and the other outstretched above his head hanging from the couch, mouth half open, I couldn't help but let out a giggle. His body shifted as his eyes fluttered open and a smile crept across his face.

"There she is..." Soda sat himself up smiling, "I knew I'd get to see that smile again." He chuckled looking at me with a twinkle in his eyes. "I almost thought I was gonna have to do this!" Soda wiggled his fingers underneath my neck making me squeal.

"Sodaahahaha!" I shrieked, attempting to bury my face into his chest as I laughed, my cheeks turning bright red.

"Ohhhh! Someone's blushin!" He teased, moving his fingers down to squeeze my ribcage, my laughter soon turned to a loud painful yelp as I lurched my body up and held my ribs. Soda's expression quickly dropped from a playful one to a face filled with concern.

"Billy…" He started before I cut him off.

"It's nothin… just pulled a muscle or somethin." I quickly babbled out rubbing my side.

His face and tone turned serious, "Then show me it's nothin."

"Sod-"

"Show me it's nothin and I'll leave it be, but you told Darry nothin else happened to ya..." He started.

"I didn't want Darry over reacting, and I don't need you too either!" I responded back, defensively.

"Billy." Soda warned, "Let me see it, I ain't playin with ya." He reached for the bottom of my shirt but I jumped up from the couch.

"Darry told me he'd feel better if I stayed here tonight, and Pony told me to sleep in yer room, so I'm gonna go get changed and I'd prefer we just went to bed now, I'm really worn after what happened."

"Fine." He said, getting up abruptly, he looked hurt. "I'm goin to the kitchen, hollar when yer done I guess." Soda pushed his way past me, storming off.

I sat on the edge of the bed, and gazed at my reflection in the dresser mirror. I can't keep doing this, the lying, the pain, the aching I felt in the pit of my stomach, the fear, its just all too much. I rubbed my thumbs into my temple. When did things have to get so complicated? Why did things have to be this way? The tears found their way back to my eyes, threatening to spill over the edge.

 _Stupid girl._ I pushed back the tears, _Just like yer mom…_ I exhaled shakily, walking over to the dresser staring into the vanity mirror.

 _Maybe._

My eyes closed.

 _Next time._

I gripped the dresser edge tightly,

 _You'll be more._

I let it dig into my hands until it stung,

 _Grateful._

I let the tears roll down my face.

I grabbed one of Soda's shirts out of the dresser drawer and lifted my arms above my head as I whispered to myself reassuringly, "It's better this way…" If only I could just believe those words, maybe everything would be ok.

I heard the door creak and whipped myself around to see Soda peeking through the doorway, his mouth agape. I looked down to my ribs, painted in shades of the late night sky; the look in his eyes knocked the wind out of my chest. That look shoved the words I was fighting to say back down my throat, and the only thing I could do was lower my arms and stare at him in silence.

 **Soda's POV**

Billy stared back at me with a look like I had just punched her in the gut; I felt it too, like the air left my lungs as I gazed into the black and blue mess that had become her ribcage. If we didn't have secrets then why did I feel like she was lying to me? Something is going on, and it's more than getting knocked by a couple of socs. _God Bills, how the hell am I supposed to protect you if you won't tell me what's hurting you?_ Now I felt the tears as they hit my cheeks, and no matter how hard I tried I knew I couldn't stop them.

"You don't trust me?" I croaked out, my voice barely a whisper.

She took a step forward reaching for me, I could see the tears already rolling down her face, "Soda please…"

I pulled myself back away from her, "Who are you…" I was crying hard now.

"Please don't say that Soda." She sobbed, "Don't look at me like that… I'm just trying to protect you." Her voice cracked, she sat down on the edge of my bed.

"Protect me? I'm supposed to be protecting you!" I almost yelled sitting next to her on the bed, tears still stinging my face, "Protect me from who?"

She looked me dead in the eyes as she choked out "Me." Before breaking down, laying herself back on the bed to face away from me.

I watched as her small body shook with heavy sobs, they rocked through her like waves; I wanted them to crash into me, to take away her pain. "Bills…" I reached out my hand and placed it on her hip, "I just don't understand…"

Billy sat up and looked at me, her eyes empty and dark, "It's all my fault Soda… this is all my fault." She began to cry harder, which I didn't think was even possible; it made my heart lurch in my chest. I pulled her into my arms and laid down pulling her body against mine.

"Please, just let me protect you." I cried against her, I felt so helpless, I had her tight in my arms but she was still so broken.

She was silent for a long while, and all I could hear were our mutual sobs, until she let out a whisper as I felt my eyes fluttering closed.

"It's better this way, I promise… it's just better this way."


	5. Chapter 5: We All Fall Down

****Hey guys, I am so sorry for the lack of updates over the past 6 months or so, and I thank each and every one of you for still supporting my story! My Abuela recently got very ill so I've been using a lot of my free time to take care of her, thank you so much for understanding** **I am going to be able to try and update my stories more often as of now and hope to read all of your comments and reviews! Happy reading lovelies 3****

I woke up to the smell of pancakes drifting through the house, well actually let me rephrase that. I woke up to the sounds of Soda snoring loudly into my ear with his armpit pressing against my face, but the pancakes would've been a much nicer way to wake. As I went to sit up I bit back the urge to cry out, as waves of pain rippled their way through my chest. It was hard to breathe, and I began to wheeze as I struggled to take in enough air. With each breath I took, the pain washed over me. This hurts much worse than yesterday, I thought to myself. I finally managed to get out of bed, I tugged the ponytail from my hair, letting my brown curls fall to my shoulders. Walking to the doorway slowly, I looked over at Soda. He laid curled in bed with the covers tucked around his body, I could still see where tears had stained his cheeks.

"Last night..." I whispered, shaking my head. I never wanted him to get upset, I hated for him to cry. I just wanted to keep him safe.

I closed the bedroom door and walked down the hall towards the living room, I could hear several voices.

"Thanks for watchin over her..." I heard a male voice say, as I drew closer. I entered the room and could see Darry standing in the doorway to the kitchen, Jake and Pony were sitting on the couch, and Dally standing near the front door.

"Jake?" I questioned, walking towards the couch. Jake stood up and rushed over to me pulling my face into his hands. He traced the outline of the bruise around my eye, his face full of guilt.

"Billy, ya shoulda let m-"

"Jake, it's ok." I cut him off pulling his hand into mine, "Please don't be upset, it's not your fault."

"I'm sorry Bills, I'm so sorry." He croaked out. I saw Dally shake his head from the corner of my eye. Darry and Pony exchanged worried glances, confused.

"Now, now Jake," Darry walked over and patted him on the back, "There's no way you could've known this was gonna happen, don't be too hard on yerself kid."

I looked at Jake with pleading eyes, I hated myself for looking at him like that, begging him to lie, to be a liar just like me.

"Thanks Dar." He managed to get out, looking back at me. "I'm just glad she's safe." He pulled me into a tight hug, squeezing me as close to his chest as possible. A lightning bolt of pain shot through my chest, I tried to hold it in but I felt dizzy as the entire center of my body seemed to throb in time with my heartbeat, I cried out, as I fell to my knees shielding my ribcage and gasping for air.

"Billy!" Jake yelled, pulling me toward him. "What's wrong?"

"I'm fine..." I coughed out the words, I was not fine. My ribs felt like someone had struck a match against them, dropped it inside, and let the fire build. Everything felt hot, everything felt tight, I pushed the feeling away and tried to flash a smile up at my worried cousin. The smile must have looked more forced than I had planned because his expression only became more troubled.

"Billy." Darry started, coming in my direction, "You told me nothin else happened last night." He was stern, but looked more concerned than angry. "Did you lie?"

"Yes..." I looked at the hard wood floor beneath me, Jake helped me to my feet, I winced.

He went to lift up my shirt, I looked at him with pleading eyes, but he could've cared less, there was so much anger behind his gaze. I didn't want him to see how bad it really was, things lately had just been getting worse and worse and I hated for Jake to be stuck in the middle of it… he's already been through enough.

Despite my worried look he lifted my shirt as I heard several of them gasp, it must look worse than yesterday. I looked down at my own chest, painted in swatches of deep blues and purples, oh god… much worse than yesterday, I felt dizzy. Jake's face grew a deep shade of red. He dropped the edge of my shirt and he barreled himself towards the front door. "That bastard!" He shouted, launching his fist into the door frame before going outside. I heard him kick a few things as he walked off. My heart sank.

Dally looked at me from the doorway, shaking his head again, this time visibly pissed.

"Billy." Darry commanded, "We are going to take you to get checked ou-"

"But!"

"No ifs, ands, or buts about it." His voice was harsh, "I get why you lied, but don't ever lie to my face again like that, we clear?" He stared back at me, waiting for an answer.

"Yes sir." I couldn't look him in the eyes, I could already feel his disappointment from across the room.

I made my way to the front door and walked out onto the porch, the whole world was shifting like my eyes couldn't focus, Dally followed me out. The door slammed behind us. I could hear the strike of his lighter as he lit up a cigarette, my back still facing him. It was a few minutes before he finally spoke.

"You're a real piece of work lately, ya know that?" He spat out.

I stared at the ground. "Dally, just don't."

"Ta hell with your 'just don't!" He spun me around to face him, he was fuming.

"Ya know I don't know what's going on with you but Jakes always gettin kicked from his own house, he's always so pissed off, always gettin yourself into trouble when you can't even take care a yourself ta begin with and-"

"Wait...". I cut him off, putting the pieces together, "Jake hasn't told you nothin?"

"Nothin?" Dally looked confused "What do ya mean? You guys got a secret or something?"

"Just forget it...". I placed my hands over my eyes, my head was spinning, Nobody knows, I thought to myself, nobody really knows what happens behind those doors, if Jake's to afraid to admit it... how can I?

Dally reached out his hand, setting it on my shoulder, I felt genuine concern in his voice, "Billy what's goin on?" His tone was serious.

"Ya know what? Just fuck off Dal." I spat out, shrugging his hand off my shoulder and turning to walk back into the house.

"Billy!" Dally yelled frustrated. "Would you just stop playing games already!"

I spun around "You know what Dal? I'm fine. I'll learn how ta take better care of myself don't you worry. I'll figure out how to 'play the game' better, I don't need your help!" I flashed him a fake smile and flipped him the bird, "Now stop pretendin to care, because you're shit at it anyway."

I pushed my way through the door into the house and could hear Darry calling my name, I grabbed my coat and ignored him, pushing past an exasperated Dally, not saying a word.

As I walked away from the Curtis's front porch I knew I was only footsteps away, but their voices became more and more distant, everything was spinning, and I couldn't catch my breath. Shaking and confused I found myself on the ground gasping, trying to pull air into my lungs. I could hear Dally calling out Darry's name, and footsteps running through the house that seemed like it was a million miles away. Coughing onto the ground I covered my mouth with my hands, they were sticky and hot and red… I tried to call out, but I could barely get enough of a breath in without choking on what seemed like a never ending sticky mess of blood flowing from my mouth. I could feel someone's arms wrapping around me and before I knew it the sky wasn't blue anymore or spinning, I couldn't hear any more voices, everything went black.


	6. Chapter 6: Where Do We Go From Here?

***Hello dear readers, I feel so bad because I am always apologizing! I have been having horrible writers block whilst still taking care of my Abuela, she is now in stage 4 kidney failure and needs a lot of help at home because the doctors have her on a very strict diet to try and help her kidneys whilst also making her take some pretty harsh medications so along with my 2 jobs she has been a huge priority, please keep her in your thoughts for me! On another note I am going to try to commit to updating every 2-3 weeks, hopefully adding things in sooner than that if I am able. I just wanted to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for sticking with this sorry and all of your amazing comments and reviews, when I get an email telling me someone left a review it makes my entire day! So please keep reviewing and providing constructive feedback, it makes me so happy! A few shoutouts as well, shout out to user Cassie-001, thank you for being my first supporter and loving my story from the very start and always providing great feedback! I love reading your reviews! And a huge shout out and thank you to new reader AngelAmongTheStars, your review gave me amazing constructive feedback that I used to really hone in on my ideas for the story and reminded me the direction i am going in with this story is tough but important, I really appreciated your insight so much! Again thank you so much for reading and following the story I love you all! ***

Watching her chest rise and fall, I couldn't take my eyes off of her.

Up and down…

Up and down...

Up and down...

With every breath she took I was terrified they would all suddenly just... stop.

**Flashback**

I was asleep when I heard the yelling, Darry was shouting my name through the house I could hear his feet pounding against the hardwood floors, Dally was yelling too. I didn't know what could possibly be so important this early in the morning, especially on a Saturday. When I shot up out of bed it took me a moment to realize that Billy wasn't still lyin' down next to me, I started to feel uneasy.

"Soda! Sodapop Curtis! Get the hell up Soda!" Darry called through the house, I could hear him snatch his truck keys off the counter.

I pulled my DX T-shirt over my head as Darry appeared in the doorway of my room, out of breath. "What's going on Dar?" I asked confused.

"It-it's Billy" he stammered "Somethin' happened, we gotta go… we gotta go to the hospital!" His face was pale.

I haven't seen Darry this worked up in a long time... not since Mom and Dad... panic began to rise in my chest and I bounded after him meeting his pace as we quickly made our way out of the house. When I saw Dally carrying Billy over to the truck my stomach started tyin itself in knots and panic rose up in my throat as I ran towards him.

"Oh god! Oh god! Dall what happe-" I was barely able to croak out before he cut me off, I kept breathing in but it felt like none of the air filled my lungs, his face was painted with sheer panic.

"I dunno kid, one minute she was stormin off from the house, normal feisty Billy, and the next she was coughin and fell on the ground..." he trailed off, face turning white as he looked down, her face pale and sticky with blood. "Kid we-we gotta go, now."

Dally hoisted himself into the back of Darry's pickup laying Billy across the back seat, holding her head in his lap. Darry and I quickly followed suit. She was still unconscious when we got to the hospital, I stared back at her the whole drive, but when we pulled up I could barely see the rise and fall of her chest anymore. The doctors took her out of Dally's arms and lifted her onto a gurney, he watched as they wheeled her through the hospital doors, with the blankest stare I had ever seen on Dallas Winston, he looked down at the blood covering his hands and jacket, his face blank. A nurse led us inside.

***End Flashback***

Gazing at the blank walls of the hospital waiting room I could remember like it was yesterday when we were here for Johnny and Ponyboy, or when we all sat in this very same room waiting to hear if my parents were going to make it; and I all to quickly am reminded of how I never wanted to have to be back here again. Because now somethin's missing.

I look over in the chair next to me and it's empty, and the open face of the palm of my hand is cold, because there is no one next to me claspin my hand tight, leaning her head on the crook of my shoulder whispering how everything will be okay in the end. No one to lay her head in my lap and let me play with her hair as we wait for bad news, to make silly faces at me when I feel like I'm gonna break, the one person I want next to me is stuck behind those doors in a hospital room, and there's nothin I can do to fix it.

I felt the hot tears begin to sting the corners of my eyes and swallowed hard wishing them away. I shift in my seat and try to inhale deeply but it catches in my chest, colliding with the wail I'm struggling to hold in. The tears are back again and my shoulders start to shake, the second they spill over Darry's arms follow, pullin themselves snug around my shoulders squeezin me tight, hiding my shame away, Greasers aren't supposed to cry.

"Everythins gonna be alright , ya hear me?" His voice was hoarse too, "So there's no need for tears, not yet." He smiled at me and squeezed a little tighter "Our girls a fighter, and she's gonna be just fine."

It was a few hours before the Doctor finally came out to talk to us, he asked us lots of questions about what happened and how Bills go so banged up, then he pulled us inside of a smaller room, my heart raced as we sat in the two cold plastic chairs across from him.

"Mr Curtis..." He began, "We have already contacted Billy's main guardian but she informed us she is out of town for work and is coming back as fast as she can, and we were unable to get a hold of her husband. She did however refer to me that you are also listed as the first emergency contact for the patient and have signed the proper forms in the past to count as an additional caregiver, is this correct?" He looked to Darry, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose with his pen.

"Yes that is correct." Darry answered.

"Good, well I have both good news and some bad news about Ms. Billy." He looked down at his chart before continuing, "From the looks of it Billy has been beaten fairly badly, she suffered several blows to the face, severe trauma to the lower abdomen, and more than 8 forceful blows to the right and left ribs, causing 3 of the ribs on her right side to break. Whoever hurt her, got her pretty good." The doctor paused and looked up at us before speaking again. "The police find it unlikely that anyone saw anything last night outside of the movies where you said she was when this happened, it was getting quite dark and they find it unrealistic that anyone will come forward given the circumstances..." He sighed looking down at his papers, "But if for some reason anything comes up they will be in contact."

Darry frowned unsatisfied, I had to bite my tongue.

"Well I'll just have to remember to thank them if they do, they're always such a big help when it comes to folks like us." He remarked sarcastically glaring at the doctor.

"But back on topic I had no idea she got knocked that bad Doc, if she had told me the truth I would have brought her here first thing.." Darry began, I could only stare at the Doctor, letting his words sink in as he spoke them aloud.

"It's alright, it's not your fault Mr. Curtis." The doctor shifted himself in the chair. "The good news is that Billy is going to be alright. She suffered from what is called traumatic pneumothorax, this is when trauma to the chest, such as the blows Billy received giving her the broken ribs, puncture a hole through the lung."

"In Billy's case two of the broken rib bones have pushed their way into her right lung, at first she was probably just in a great deal of pain but as she left the wound untreated the puncture became worse and that is why the bleeding and difficulty to breathe began." He looked at us, his eyes gazing above the tops of his glasses before continuing.

"The bad news is that we did have to perform surgery to remove the bones from her lung and begin to repair the lung itself because the damage was so severe. Right now Billy has a tube inserted into her chest that we are using to pull the excess air from her chest cavity, in a few weeks we will have to use this same tube to begin to re-inflate her lung after it has had time to heal before we are able to remove the tube completely. Billy will recover but will need to remain in the hospital for 6-8 weeks to be closely monitored."

"So she's gonna be ok then Doc?" I asked voice husky.

"Yes, she'll be alright." He looked to me and then back to Darry.

"But if she doesn't learn to stay out of trouble, next time your friend won't be so lucky." He set down the stack of papers, removing his glasses and locking his eyes with mine.

"I mean this with the best of intentions when I say that your friend Mr. Curtis.." He paused taking a sharp breath inward. "She is a very tough young lady, I understand she can hold her own... but she's still exactly that... a young lady."

"She can have the strongest will in the world, and wit as sharp as a nail, and she may think no one can break her but physically... they could crush her in a second. Please for her sake make sure she understands that."

I nodded my head looking to Darry, oh boy did I hear him, loud and clear.


End file.
